In the Canadas

I had a smashing time in the Canadas! The weather was cool, the rice beer was ripe and I was able to see fellow Russian Ritas Wiener-Rita, Jimmy-mou, KendRita and Skelei-Rita.

Mamma Rita had ordered a lot of gluten-free desserts which, through an overabundance of joy, gave me a B.B.B.* Mamma Rita was happy that Wiener-Rita had one more person on whom to lavish her love and distribute it more evenly. Self-named "Old Fart Rita" was overworked and Romanian contractors were crawling through his bedroom window at night trying to give him building plans. Brother Rita was hauling scrap metal out of the river and diving in dumpsters.

Papa Fujio came to visit on June 28th. Unfortunately his hotel told him upon arriving that the smoker's room he had reserved was not available. The poor man had to stay in a non-smoking room. It got to be too much for Fujio and he booked a room for the following night in the smoke filled ghetto of the Executive Suites near the old Embassy. We had a great time with Papa Fujio. He was really funny and easy-going. Heather hugged him and wouldn't let go of him. After he had left, she begged me to phone him so she could talk to him.

Other than that, the stay was pleasantly uneventful. My mom and I snuck off early one morning to go to the beach. You forget how therapeutic the warm sand, waves and open skies can be.

KendRita and I went to her coworker's party. It was fun times! They had a live band and had hired their own personal bartender. KendRita won the Guitar Hero championships and made the tweens and teens hang their heads in shame.

I took a picture of Kendrita and the band. She has these whimsically satanic eyes as if she were looking back with nostalgia on all of her misdeeds.

It was a great vacation. I miss the home of the beaver already!

*Big Bubble Butt